In the Past two months Life has been but a blur. The Human Mind takes things as they come. I have been translating every experience and absorbing it as much as I can while it takes place. Even with the silent moments of downtime- it is to recollect and recover from all the action that has taken place. Whether it is hustling to have food for the next day to planning my trip to the next Major Jam, there has been little time to think and absolutely no time to F*ck around. And that If I did F around I surely would pay for it down the line. How? Well less time on certain priorities such as setting up my unemployment (inwhich I have never done) surely added struggle and adversity to a later date. Of course after 2 years in NYC I surely had been conditioned to survive of the minimum and the courage to create any kind of Hustle that I could.
One of the Main things I had been reminded is believing in myself and my own gifts. What can I offer? I have my Talent. The next important thing is Work Ethic. It is a switch that just must be turned on. Shifting gears to make shit work.
Shortly after my Performance at New York State of Mind Party
the debate of whether to go to SilverBack Open had Arose. A couple of good friends I had amalgamated in NYC (#tinderkingz) had invited me for a road trip to Philly for SBO, which included a Hotel room as well. Knowing that I had crew coming in as well I went ahead and agreed on being Down. Infact it was the very thought of - I have no business being at this Jam. - made me want to fight that kind of thinking and that is exactly why I went. I did not want to miss out on the experience. Going to that jam provided me with a special insight which involved connections, being seen, cypher call out battling, and witnessing the Maya Boys do their thing. I also witness things going on across the board with other -I'd like to say groups- squads perhaps. Especially with younger headz - Lot of Drama. I was just like Micheal Jackson eating popcorn meme in a hotel room watching and listening to kids argue amongst each other. To be honest its a beautiful thing to see it happen because who else would they experience this with. Not us,, we are to wise. and already past that.
The overall experience I had at this year's SBO was a lot more clear for me than the first Time I went which had been the first year it was thrown. In which I found myself overwhelmed and unsure if I even enjoyed the platform of event. It could be that my own growth and personal choice of enjoyment which mad it better for myself this time around.
There was one point where I was in the circle watching Weapon X take out kids several years older than him who actually were not that bad but I can tell had not been breaking more than 5 or 6 years but just had the current awesome moves. He would piece them apart and not let them go. MEanwhile during on of his battles I hear a loud ROAR from the crowd as someone in the main event Cypher just kills it. I see a mass of people including those making the cypher MYself, weapon and the poor kid he was serving, just disperse and regroup closer to the main event stage to view what was going on. The kid and weapon still throwing down. It was amazing to witness the energy of people shift and yet also see and feel what was going on right before me. To me that was something that couldn't be shown or exampled in a live feed. It was also something especially so unique and different , not something Im going to see at a 9-5 normal day in the office. It is and was a spectacle.
The connections I made over that weekend were real and time well spent with a good group of Friends I made out in NYC. Even situating my ride back ( which was already set) I decided to give up my spot t another Bboy who is a refugee here from a Country in Europe. I told my friend Eddy Lu to not charge him and infact I would still pay my fraction. The least I could do for someone that needed help more. I knew I could find a different ride back. Inwhich I ended up in Bgirl MAntis Car joining Full circle souljahs Flonetik and Atomik (Tomas Manon) The freestyle Flow was real and we kept it rockin with laughs and deep concepts the whole way back to the city. Stopping in a random city in outer New Jersey for coffee we spoke of life and its meanings. It is good to discover the love and family aspect with other people and crews. It will only have you long and remember your own.
The next day I am traveling up from Brooklyn as I usually would I run into Mighty Mike from Master Mind Rockers - who was on his way to Queens- me I was heading straight into a work end of the year food party. ( I was relieved from working the shift Thank Jah) Tired as I was I ate drank more coffee and had just got word of RAkim Performing at the Electric Bowery. I had scored VIP so myself, a coworker and Bgirl REmedee who had joined for the party decided to meet up with Bboy chapter from Taiwan and Christian Longhi from Italy. After more coffee we hit the Venue. Although hindsight it was definetely a treat- Stretch Armstrong, LArge Professor and Premier were on first. The Bowery Basement had eventually filled up and certain heads eventually left before RAkim had even came on.. which wasnt until the last 20 minutes of the night however when he finally did it was AMazing to Me. he was RIGHT THERE. and I only paid like 10 bux. I had never been that hype to be honest and he hardly rapped shit - he let the crowd do a lot of it.. but real talk - his PRESENCE alone... btw to me.. thats the power of someones presence.. MAybe it is whether they got it or they don't.. but He surely had it and ahs it by now. Not all artists can do such a thing at the moment. Rakim is somewhere in his career and existence. That if he wlaks into the right venue or spot with his fans .. he gonna shake the room.
Paid in Full -when i be on the mic - Juice - just a few he performed but yo.. Shook that building. After the show one Lady was dead tired she took the Cab home the rest of us took our trains to our seperate Boroughs. More conversations about life and goals. Being Tired and Emotional set the tone for deep conversation. I would speak of my crew and Why I really wanted to see them and my self claim on importance in involvement. I know I am finding myself within all this and all the while am reminded to work on Me first. Over the weekend I relearned and was rewarded with the importance of friendship, accountability and sticking it out until the final Lyric. To me it is experience and atmosphere that shapes our immediate world. We get caught up in stability all though it is important we cant be a slave to our fears. I think a litle bit of risk is important and recieving love also goes a long way. HOw else would you build? I think at this point for myself it is a start.
The next chapter is leaving NYC.